Stay Tuned After This Insightful Break

Last Sunday, my pastor spoke on the subject of forgiveness. Last week, I grappled with the subject of forgiveness in conversations with my parents and familiar ol' counselor. Yesterday morning, my new counselor brought up the subject of forgiveness. (Ah, back in the counseling saddle again. This man is a dear old chap.) Anyway, I started a-thinkin' that perhaps I should consider something that the Lord might just maybe be addressing in my life.

So today I took the advice of this motley crew and whipped out my journal and a couple of pens. The exercise was heart-wrenching and wise, so let me recommend to any and all readers who call themselves human:

Spend some real time thinking about hurts in your life and their varying sources. Perhaps you've already forgiven and long moved on; perhaps there is complicated pain that you blame God or yourself for. Write down all parties who have brought pain, regardless of whether or not your grudge is legitimate. Write with each name what they've done and what they owe.

Example: childhood friend Petey - moved away and never wrote. Owes: a few letters.

Or whatever.

Then, cancel the debts. This is not an easy step. I chose to cancel each one right after writing it down, and did it by writing "CANCELLED" in red pen over what was just written. (Are there two L's in cancelled? Is it 'canceled'? Perhaps the more important question is, can I actually release these parties from emotional obligation if I misspelled the word cancelled?)

Give it a shot. Counselors aren't spouting off this kind of insight without reason. God doesn't extend forgiveness to me just so I can perpetually mope or rail against those who can't or won't or shouldn't fulfill their debts to me. My insight after doing this (for the first time) is that it's a good idea to take some time, a few days maybe, to think and pray through a similar exercise. It's not easy to swallow or fun, but it's good.

Kind of like broccoli.